Political Correctness Will Kill the Radio Star

With the PC police quickly demolishing its way through beloved children’s franchises like Looney Tunes and The Muppets, its only a matter of time till they turn their attention to yet another source of joy in our lives, music.

So, as a courtesy to the PC police, I have decided to save them the trouble of cancelling our classics, by providing them with alternate new titles that better fit within the approved terminology of their liking. The list includes:

She Works Hard for the Money - He/She/It/They/Them Work Hard for the Money

Rocketman -Rocketperson

Once, Twice, Three Times a Lady - Once Twice, Three Times an Ungendered Person

Brown Sugar - Strong Black Woman

Pappa Don’t Preach - Adult Guardian Don’t Preach

You Shook Me All Night – You Socially Distanced from Me All Night

You’re So Vain – You’re So Good at Self Care

I Want to Hold Your Hand - I Want to Hold Your Hand with Your Consent

Ebony and Ivory – Black Lives Matter and White Privilege

Everyone is Kung Fu Fighting – Everyone is Practicing Asian-Inspired Martial Arts

Livin’ on a Prayer – Livin’ on a Belief in Nothing

Big Poppa – Large Paternal Figure

My Girl – My Person

Borderline – There are No Borders

As funny as this may seem, a lot of truth is said in jest, and it really is a matter of time before the song “Son of a Preacher Man” becomes “Trans Daughter of a Preacher Person.” I’m all for live and let live, but the problem is that the PC police are anarchists who want everyone to live under their ideology of normal. They aren’t looking for coexistence. They are looking to take over and destroy everything that doesn’t fit within their masterplan.

My advice to you America comes from the late, great Bob Marley. “Get up, stand up. Stand up for your rights! Get up, stand up. Don’t give up the fight.” #Truthbomber