Matt Damon Really “F’s” Up


In an attempt to prove his newfound wokeness, actor Matt Damon proudly announced that he retired using the gay “f slur” after being rebuked by his daughter.


"The word that my daughter calls the 'f-slur for a homosexual' was commonly used when I was a kid, with a different application…. I made a joke, months ago, and got a treatise from my daughter. She left the table. I said, 'Come on, that's a joke! I say it in the movie 'Stuck on You!''" he said. "She went to her room and wrote a very long, beautiful treatise on how that word is dangerous. I said, 'I retire the f-slur!' I understood."


Not all we’re pleased with Matt’s journey into “modern masculinity.” Comedian Billy Eichner commented,” I want to know what word Matt Damon has replaced f****t with.”

The backlash continued with one Twitter user saying, "Matt Damon is a whole grown 51 year old man... And his Gen Z baby told him a homophobic slur is not okay. Like was he just walking around dropping this on sets…”

“Matt Damon’s teen daughter told him f****t is a homophobic slur and to stop using it. Matt Damon who works in Hollywood. Matt Damon who went to Harvard. Matt Damon who was in ‘BEYOND THE CANDELABRA’. I’m now worried what else she’s gonna have to teach him,” said another Twitter user.

Matt, welcome to the year 2021. It’s a time where you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Wait, can we still say the damn?#Truthbomber